Dear Diary,
Home sweet home!
I can’t even remember how long it’s been since my last entry. I’ve just been traveling so much lately, you know, trying to stay busy.
I was in Manila this weekend on the last leg of a press junket for the new Bourne movie. My crazypants agent booked me for interviews in Milan, Paris and then Manila all within 48 hours! Total madness, but at least I was able to see my grandparents while I was in Manila. They’ve been visiting out there for a couple months.
Oh, get this: Renner is getting top billing on the Bourne movie posters. Can you believe that? I know he’s the star, but I’ve been getting rave reviews for my secret spy cat cameo.
I mean, I didn’t have to dig deep for the role. When you spend your formative kitten years fending for yourself as a stray on the mean streets of Mill Valley, you get pretty good at defending yourself.
Sure, it brought back some difficult memories…all of those cold, lonely nights without a drop of gravy in my belly, but I just channeled the emotions into my performance.
That’s what you do when you’re an A-list Hollywood kitty.
You may have heard that Renner did some of his own stunts in the movie. Well, I did all of mine. Trained like a mofo for ’em, too, so I’d get everything just right.
DO NOT try this at home, kids…
More stunt training…
Anywho, haven’t done much since I got home this afternoon. Just chilled outside, ate some grass and went for a long walk with my assistant. I just want to take it easy for a few days before things get crazy again next month.
I’ll be in New York for Fashion Week, and wouldn’t you know it? I’m booked for twice as many shows as last season!
Actually, it was by choice this time. Ever since Karl Lagerfeld’s cat, Choupette, hit the scene, I feel like I can’t slack for a second. Those little blue-eyed kittens — they’ll claw you in the back if you give ’em half a chance.
So yeah, I’ll be putting in some serious overtime next month, which reminds me, I should work on my runway walk. It’s been a long time since I practiced my catwalk cat walk with Ms. J…
WERK it, b*tch!!
Good thing I don’t mind being so busy. I actually enjoy putting in the hours.
That’s one of the best things I learned from my mentor, Tim Gunn, that you have to find a way to enjoy your work.
By that same token, you also have to know how to unwind.
Speaking of that, where’d I leave my crinkly ball…?
That’s the beauty of downtime — you get to do whatever you want.
Maybe I’ll even let my assistant make me gravy. 🙂
Later,
Tabs
Awww…. welcome home, Tabs. You definitely deserve to take some time to refresh and recharge your batteries. You give so much to the world!
Thanks for the warm welcome, Heidi.
BTW, please tell Missy that I did receive her text about meeting up for catnip cocktails. I’ll have to check with my assistant, but I think Weds should be fine.
XOXO,
Tabs
Ah Tabs, we’re glad you’re back and yes, I’m going to tell my kitty back at home not to try the stunts on his own until he grows up
That’s a good idea, Nivedita! Those stunts are no joke!
Whisker kiss,
Tabs
Dear Tabs, I’m writing on behalf of my kitty Ernesto. He’s a big fan of your work, and he found your performance in the last Bourne movie absolutely stunning!
He’d love to get a paw print as an autograph, if you find the time…
Hope you can help make a fellow kitty happy.
Sincerely
L.
Dear Lulle and Ernesto,
Thank you so much! I’ll have my assistant send one an autographed photo.
Kisses to you both,
Tabs
Tabs! So glad to hear you’re relaxing. Be sure to get your beauty rest before NYFW because I hear Choupette and her assistant KL indeed are conceited clawers, especially when it comes to such natural handsomeness as you possess.
Hi Michelle,
Will do. I’m trying hard to keep myself above the drama, but you know, in fashion it’s kind of expected to run into that sort of thing every once in a while.
Keep on keepin’ on, my friend.
Purrs,
Tabs
Ahhh Tabs!!! You must be the coolest cat owner in your hood getting to walk a hunk like this 🙂
My assistant is okay, I guess. I could’ve done worse!
XO,
Tabs
Dear Tabs
You are an inspiration to aspiring kitty models all over the world. I too had a rough start on the streets, begging and working for scraps. Luckily I found an assistant a few months ago who saw my true potential.
I have to share my house with two roommates, but I’m so busy traveling I don’t have to put up with them too much. They’re older than me and don’t book as much work as I do. In fact, I’ll be featured on a episode of House Hunters: The Feline Edition where I search for the perfect apartment in NYC. It would be great it if you could stop out when you’re on the east coast. I’d love to learn from one of the best.
Thanks again for all your hard work. You truly are a legend.
Sincerely,
Miss Nina Kitty
P.S. Have your assistant plant some catnip in the yard. After a hard day’s work, I really enjoy unwinding with some fresh leaves.
Hi Miss Nina Kitty,
It’s always nice to meet an up-and-coming kitty model. Congrats on your gig on House Hunters, that’s MAY-JAH!!!
I’ll be pretty busy with NYFW, but hopefully I’ll be able to sneak away for a second to visit. How about we meet at my favorite organic catnip bar in Park Slope?
Love ya,
Tabs
I
… sad face @ the comment cut.
Tabs, you have the most purr-fect paws and I
Hey Nina,
Hello to you and all my Texas fur baby friends. Have a lovely week, and keep on being fabulous!
Mwah,
Tabs
Tabs you’re so amazing!! I love you!! *Lifts streamer that says: Marry me, Tabs!”
Love,
Your No. 1 Fan in Manila, Philippines
Salamat, Mej!
XOXO,
Tabs
Tabs! You are back! And how! Meow Mrrow, my charming friend :).
We finally got around watching The Bourne Legacy yesterday. Mr. Renner werks it!
I’m so glad you enjoyed the film. Did you like my performance?
Kisses,
Tabs
‘Course Tabs! Your performance was stellar (as always)! Kisses back atcha’, my purry-furry love!
Salamat! (for being such a sunshine!)
Oh how that leash makes me giggle! What a pretty coat you have Tabs!
Oh my gosh a cat on a leash! I didn’t know that was possible!
Tabs,
I love reading your diary entries. Our cats, Maxwell and Oscar, would maybe like the harness. I may have to get them one to try out. You rock! (O and M say “hey”!)
Tiffany
uhh Tabs you are so cute and fatty.. can I squeeze you? ^^