A few years ago on a girl’s spa day up in Napa with my friends Jen and Cindy, I decided to live a little and try something different — something other than a massage or facial.
I had a mud bath.
And it was absolutely, positively the most disgusting thing I’ve ever done.
No, it wasn’t the dirt. I’m totally OK with dirt. Mud too. I have no problem getting dirty. I went into it expecting something relaxing, like a massive Glam Glow mask for my entire body.
Little did I know…
When we got to the spa, everything was hunky-dory until they took me to the room with the mud baths.
Uh…where’s my private room? I wondered. Where’s my tub?
Instead of there being a single tub in a private room, all of the mud baths were in a huge open space, all lined up in industrial rows.
There were also ladies in the tubs, and more ladies waiting for their turn, so we were all just standing there — buck naked and awkward — for, oh, 10 minutes or so (did I mention it was awkward?), until it was our turn.
At that point, the spa technicians kicked three women out of the tubs they were in and plopped us in their places.
Sooooo…the mud wasn’t fresh.
Yeah, I don’t know why, but I’d assumed they’d empty the tubs after each person, and refill them with new mud for the next.
Is that crazy? I mean, I guess dirt is dirt and all, but whatever — it grossed me out. The entire time I was sitting in that tub, I kept thinking of all the naked people who’d been there before me, and all of the strands of body hair and wayward bits of poo floating around…
Who knows how long they’d been using that same mud. It could’ve been weeks or months or YEARS!
Looking back on it, I probably should have said, “NO ACTUALLY I’LL PASS! I’M GOOD! I’LL JUST WAIT HERE!” But I was overwhelmed by the grossness of it all and couldn’t stop myself before I was completely immersed in the mud, and by that point, it wasn’t easy to get out.
That mud was hot and encumbering. Difficult to move around in. And then my claustrophobia kicked in, and I couldn’t breathe. To make matters worse, I was sitting facing a wall that was covered with these really scary masks, and I couldn’t look to either side — mostly out of shock, but also because it might seem like I was ogling the other naked women in the tubs next to me.
IT WAS THE MOST DISGUSTING 20 MINUTES OF MY LIFE!
Lesson learned here: opt for the massage or facial. 🙂
What’s the most disgusting thing you’ve ever done in the name of beauty?
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
Karen
In an effort to avoid buying Sunday Riley Good Genes, I’ve been making my own lactic acid face mask with nonfat dry milk and apple cider vinegar. Let me tell you, it smells HORRIBLE. The vinegar makes my eyes water like crazy (seriously, crying-caliber watering), and the milk smells just terrible and makes me gag. My husband won’t even sit in the same room as me when I wear the mask. BUT, it does make my skin look great!
Oh my god, I am laughing so hard at that story. That sounds so nasty! It has encouraged me to never try a mud bath, so thanks for that.
I can’t say I’ve ever done anything to top that, or even come close. I got a mani/pedi once where the person cut my cuticles so badly that I was bleeding everywhere, and then he laughed about it when I got upset, does that count? :/ Although that’s more of a beauty horror story than anything.
Well, I almost put really expired (I hadn’t even had it for a year) lash glue on my eyes. Nothing on purpose.
Ew. Ewwww. I don’t even think that’s, like, legal! I love giving mud wraps but always warn clients that they are gonna look awful until they shower. And we always use individual mud cups 🙂
o_O That is so unsanitary. I can’t believe any self-respecting business would do something so unprofessional!
So I had a mold problem in my room, and some of my blushes and one of my eyeshadows got a bit moldy. …So I scraped off the top layer with some tissue and kept using it anyway. I know it was awful, but they were expensive or hard to find and I was just hoping that would fix it and it wouldn’t grow any mold anymore. To my credit, I threw away one of the blushes and a lipstick!
Oh my god, that is horrifying…the public nakedness, the reused mud…I’m cringing! I don’t think I have any story that compares to that. Probably the grossest beauty-related thing I’ve done is let my brushes go too long without cleaning. More in the name of laziness than in the name of beauty.;)
Gross. Total gross. That can’t be sanitary with all those naked people getting into those tubs. *shudders*
I haven’t done anything close to that gross. I’ve used some hair removal creams which smelled chemical-filled and disgusting but that’s about it.
That sounds so terrible. I’ve never done anything “gross” for beauty.
I have so many mishaps, all of them because I was being a good friend and doing the “yeah, I’ll totally do that Masterclass, etc”.
The worst by far was the MAC counter (yes, MAC, how could it go so wrong is what you’re thinking) where I swear to God that the MUA wanted to be anywhere but there.
My bff looked like she had Restylane in her lips (they over lined them and then filled them in with gloss that was an electric purple nightmare that screamed early 80’s and it was only a couple of years ago) and I kept singing “that dude looks like a lady” because I looked like a MAN IN DRAG.
It was Masterclass RuPaul style.
What did I learn? I learned that we were never to park the car on the other side of the shopping centre (it was like a walk of shame and by the time we got to the car we were both laughing so hard we couldn’t walk – we actually heard whisperings from passers-by with the “did you see her LIPS?!” and “I think that’s a GIRL!?”) and to NEVER ever go to another makeup application without makeup remover wipes.
My bff’s husband did the “OMG” when she got home. My fiancé spent a good 5 minutes looking at me with a confused look and then said “what did they DO to you? You look…..like a guy trying to look like a girl”. My foundation was so badly matched that it had patches of dark that looked like stubble. Just thinking about it makes me laugh.
OMG I did the same thing and left just as traumatized. I thought it would be a mud wrap I think. It smelled and it was so awkward I haven’t gone back to a Napa Valley spa since. Probably 15 years now. I was too young and green to complain or stop myself but EWE!!!
Lol omg that sounds disgusting! I always wanted to try a mud bath (with underwear lol) for a while but after your story I think I’ll indefinitely pass. It just seems too gross! So far I haven’t done anything gross and I hope I don’t in the future either lol. Sorry you had to go through that!
That sounds terrible! I’ve never really done much in the name of beauty except up makeup on, so I’ve probably escaped a lot of these trials…
I’m so disgusted by this experience! I don’t think I’ve done anything overly disgusting in the name of beauty!
The worst thing that’s happened to me beauty-wise was that I put hair removal cream on my bikini line and got the worst chemical burns of my life! My poor hoo-haa!
Used very old glue for my lashes, no intention but I paid later!
I’m not sure this counts:
I’m 50, and without getting too graphic, I have to say that the older one gets, nostril maintenance takes on increasing importance.
that’s hilarious. i would opt out starting from minute one of standing around naked lol.
the most disgusting thing i’ve done was probably use shampoo to brush my teeth. i was staying at this dive shack and found that i forgot to bring my toothpaste. it was late night and i did not want to head out in the dark to find one. and i thought: one sls-infused product is the same as any other, right? WRONG! shampoo tastes TERRIBLE, and the after-taste a couple days after, yuck!
Ok so I didn’t do this but just heard about it from my friend! Her good friend went to a fancy new Korean spa for a body scrub. She was taken to a large open area, got naked, and several young women were aggressively exfoliating her simultaneously as she lay on a table of sorts. I couldn’t stop saying, “OMG! Were her naked boobs flying around in a public area?!?!” The answer was yes. I just cannot imagine this. I am still amazed anyone has the cajones to do this! I cannot believe you had to stand around naked waiting on an already-used mud bath! Karen! I am shivering in fear and horror on your behalf!
Eek how traumatic indeed!