Shoot, how much time do you have, because we could be here all day.
ALL DAY.
Honestly, I can’t even make an accurate estimate, but it’s upwards of 12, maybe as high as 20, and I know that sounds like a lot, but I’ve lived through MANY haircuts gone wrong.
Let’s see… Off the top my head, there was that one in first grade when my grandma, who was attending cosmetology school at the local community college at the time, convinced my mom that it was in the family’s best interest to give me a bowl cut and a tight poodle perm.
It did not end well. Shortly after the perm grew out, The Ralph Macchio cut happened.
SERIOUSLY, WHAT WAS MY MOM THINKING LETTING ALL THESE PEOPLE DO CRAZY THINGS TO MY HAIR!?
There were also numerous bad haircuts in middle school, one involving a Princess Diana haircut that went very wrong… I’m gonna leave your imagination to that one.
In high school a series of terrible layered bangs, but that was my own damn fault. I often cut my own hair bear bangs and had no idea what I was doing.
For several years in college I got a slight respite because my hair was long, and I didn’t have the extra cash to do stuff to it, but when I started working full-time in my 20s, gurrrrrl — that’s when sh*t really hit the fan. I had just enough money in my pocket to go to salons where ladies got their hair “DONE”, but the done I was doing rarely worked out. My hair is naturally wavy, and back then it seemed like hardly anyone knew what to do with it, like that one time when the person who cut my hair into what was supposed to be a J.Lo-inspired shag used a razor… I ended up with a mullet, and not a pseudo mullet, but a full-on ’80s mullet with a rat tail!
I wore my hair up for months after that! (I also developed a severe fear of razor cuts that didn’t go away until I met my friend/hair whisperer Alis.)
There was also the person who cut my hair the day before she was scheduled to leave on a three-month trip to Thailand… I guess her mind was on packing for vacation, because she completely changed the direction my hair parted.
Oh, and all of the lopsided hair cuts… SO MANY OF THEM! ’tis the curse of wavy hair with a varied curl pattern.
When you answer this question, I hope you get to say “never,” or “only once or twice,” because growing out a bad haircut seems to take roughly forever.
Anyway, let me know! And let me know what you did last night! Did you score lots of candy? ?? Connor kept grabbing handfuls of Swedish Fish, even though I kept aggressively whispering “Get the Snickers for mommy!!!”
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
Karen
I only had one, but it shaped my hair’s future for all time! Just before my (christian) confirmation I went to the most expensive hair salon in town and asked to get the bob. The “call the manager” bob, where there are no bangs and the hair is cut so that it’s shorter at the back of the neck and longer in the front near the face. I ended up with a freakin bowl cut with bangs! Just before all the picture taking and the major family event! I have never forgiven hairdressers after that and have just cut the ends of my hair (myself!) ever since! And it was in 1994!
Hi Karen! This post made me Lol outloud so many times. I am so sorry about the bad cuts you have had. I was pretty scarred my entire life till about a few years ago about sitting in a hair stylists chair. I have very thin, curly hair and it seems like I am yet to meet someone who can actually work with my hair and do something reasonably attractive with it!
A few, but not that many to leave me traumatized. But I have had many bad hair color experiences!
Oh, definitely. I have very thick, wavy hair, so almost no-one knows how to handle both. Once one stylist gave up layering my hair halfway through because maybe she got tired of how much hair I have? so half my head was layered, the rest was just blunt cut. I had to go back and demand a refund and a fix after that one. Another one did the Japanese straight perm (back when those were popular) too close to the scalp so the hair was bent at 90 degrees and started breaking off.
Now, I know how to advocate for myself and I will stop the stylist and critically look at my hair and make them fix whatever I don’t like, right there. LOL I don’t worry about offending them or being too polite to say anything anymore!
Oh god. My mom SCALPED me when we were on vacation when I was little. She kept cutting and cutting saying “It’s not even” until I had a cut too short to even qualify as a bowl cut. I cried.
After that, I went to a high-priced, specialized stylist in the style I wanted and brought photos of what I wanted and ended up with something about 3″ shorter than what I wanted. End of professional cuts for a long, long time. The last time someone other than me cut my hair, I wanted a shoulder-length cut, plain straight across bob. The first snip was at EARLOBE length and I stopped her and said “WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!?!?!?!” before I tore out of there. Good grief!!!!
After that, I only cut my hair myself. I’ve made it too short several times (I thought I was being moderate at the time) but at least I have nobody to blame but myself if it turns out too short. At least it’s just too short and not paper-bag-on-my-head hideous.
Oh, you know, just about every hair cut I get leaves something to be desired. I have a bit of wave, a bit of curl, lots of cowlick and probably one possibility for a flattering style. That I’ve come back to dozens of times in my adult life. 🙂 It’s actually looking decent now but I’m getting it cut tomorrow. I’m sure I’ll have some styling challenges. That said, I refuse to spend 2 weeks in China with unruly hair so I’ll have to suck it up. I know the color will be great, but I’m sure I’ll struggle with how everything falls.
Way back when I was 13 I had long curls almost like Shirley Temple . Styles then were trending short so I begged my mom . We cut it and my grandfather had a fit ! Why did you cut her hair ?
Well it wasn’t until the 70’s when layered cuts were trending this guy from England : Raymond gave me an exquisite cut and blew it dry .
Much later I wore a bob and used a diffuser but suffered many too short cuts until the Bob . My niece does my hair now so I’m kinda spoiled !
Omg did I laugh at this post. Then I cried at the mention of the razor cut gone bad ? Wavy hair girl here-my razor “just to thin the bulk” cut, gave me haircut anxiety for years! I looked like full bangs from the front, a plucked chicken from the back.
I read the title of this post and thought, “You’ve gotta be kidding me. I don’t have enough fingers and toes to count up all the bad hair cuts I’ve had.” I dunno, maybe I’m just super picky about my hair or moody during and after haircuts. Or maybe it’s just my thin, fine hair.
We stayed home and watched the Warriors game (there was a moment when we thought we’d get last minute tickets and go, but Dear Husband didn’t feel like dealing with traffic and he wasn’t sure Anthony Davis would be playing and he thought the game would be boring without him) and handed out Hershey’s bars. Trying to maintain my health, so Snickers are not allowed in this house.
I’ve probably had a couple but the one that I remember the most was from when I was 12, the hairdresser did such a bad job & it was so uneven (was just supposed to be a trim) that I had to go back up to a bob length after growing it to a couple inches below my shoulders (which is long for me). There was probably a good 3 inches difference between the longest & shortest bits of just a plain haircut. I was devastated. I also had a bad one a couple years later where the used the razor to thin my hair which did not work with my curly, frizzy hair, although now hairdressers have managed to do it just fine but I looked like a frizz ball for months unless I straightened my hair (which I did, it was 2010 so it was in).
Just one – when I was 11, my mom decided I needed “the shag.” Even though it was the 80s and the shag was over. I actually don’t remember what it looked like, nor what I looked like at 11 at all, since I despised it so much I didn’t allow any photographs for the better part of a year until it grew out.
Hi Karen,
I’m so grateful that there was no such thing as selfies back in the ’80s! Thank goodness there is very little documentation of all my bad haircuts, ha ha!