Hiya, friend. Earlier this week I talked about turning negatives into positives with a quickness. Well, I’m still working on flipping and reversing it à la Missy Elliott, and the issue I’m dealing with right now is one of the things I find most challenging: setting realistic expectations of what I can accomplish in a set amount of time.
I don’t know if it’s the former perfectionist in me (I’m working on it), but I always want to do more, finish more, check more things off my to-do list, and I consistently overshoot and overestimate what I can take on.
For example, if I only have 10 minutes to feed the fam, instead of whipping up three PBJ sandwiches, slicing an apple and calling it done, invariably, I’ll slice a stack of veggies and dice a pound of chicken like a crazy kitchen ninja to make an Insta-worthy meal (which I’ll also have to take pictures of, of course). So, instead of doing what I could have done in 10 minutes, I spend 45 minutes, also known as “35 minutes more than I had.”
The result? I’m behind, and everyone (including me!) is starving and crabby.
THIS IS MY LIFE, GUYS!
I don’t know why, but I’ve always done this. But I’m determined to flip the script and stop setting myself up to fail.
If you also struggle with overestimating what you can accomplish, here’s what I’ve been doing to address it lately:
I take account of how much time I have for any given task (i.e. 15 minutes to do the laundry), and then I significantly undershoot what I plan to accomplish in that block of time (only sorting and starting one load).
I’m all for giving 110% and going above and beyond, but sometimes, you (and I) need to remember that we aren’t working robot zombies. Sometimes it’s OK to pull it back, and it’s OK to be completely honest with yourself and say, “Look, I know you want to do all teh things, but it’s just not feasible, and you’re not going to pretend it is and set yourself up for failure.”
Remember that self-love refers to more than luxurious lotions and fancy face masks (although those can also be nice). Sometimes, loving and caring for yourself means setting more realistic expectations.
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
Karen
P.S. TGIF! ?
Same, girl, same. I do this a lot on Sundays. I expect to have meals cooked and prepped for the week, including a big Sunday dinner and it’s just madness.
Ditto. I always believe I can clean the house top to bottom, get the groceries, paint my nails and have a dinner party in one day. Thanks for this post!
You’re so welcome, Lily!
I love this post to the zillionth degree! So guilty of this as well. No matter how much I’ve learned how long things realistically take, there is always a part of me that thinks, yes I can squeeze it into the little time I have. I’m getting better in my older age but it still happens. Helpful to know others are on this same journey! 🙂
You’re not the only one, Sharon! 🙂 Do you have any tools or tips/tricks that help you? I find that when I’m good about using my timer (the one i have is by Wrenwane), it’s very helpful. Also, taking lots and LOTS of time to plan helps a ton.
Happy Friday to you!
Ha, I remember when I was childfree, I read a travel tip to parents re family vacations: figure out all you want to do, then cut that in half. I remember thinking, wow what a bummer for those guys. Years later I realize how wise that advice was -better to try to do less & enjoy it to the max, than drive yourself & everyone else nuts trying to do too much! Not sure if that qualifies as a tip but it’s what I was thinking of when I wrote my post, lol.
Have a wonderful weekend!
Oh yes & we love timers too. The Boy is well into that habit along with me.
That’s a great tip, and so helpful. 🙂 I hope you have a wonderful weekend, too!
(P.S. Can’t believe summer is over!)
Amen to all of this!
Love this. Self care isn’t just the fun stuff, it’s the hard stuff too.
Oh yes, I am working on that too. It is a little better now that I schedule things and really stop doing them once the time is up and move on to the next task, but that only works when no one disturbs me.
Not realistic with two small children…
I used to make a few double items on Sunday but now that it’s just two of us we just wing everyday . My favorite tho is breakfast for dinner because I love breakfast ?!
Have a Happy Labor Day !
If it’s dinner, I start 30 minutes before the time I think I NEED to start. An hour before for holiday meals. It’s worked out well. And, worst case, everyone eats early; which is so much nicer than late. HAHA! For family vacations, I plan every minute but I don’t get attached to the plans. If we fit everything in, that’s great. If not, maybe next time. But I do find it comforting to have the plan, just in case. 🙂 As for housework, I guess my attitude is that if it’s not done today, it’ll be done tomorrow. And, unfortunately for most things, even if it is done today, it’ll probably have to be done AGAIN tomorrow. I’m very envious of the people whose houses look like they belong in a magazine but I’ve realized that it’s not worth it (to me) to spend my time keeping mine like that. It never lasts the day. 🙂 I know you’re a list person so maybe just make a priority list. What absolutely must be done (work, meals, bringing Connor to school) and then throw a few smaller things in between? And try to take it easy on yourself. Look at what you’re expecting and then honestly ask if you would expect that from anyone else in your life. Last story that kind of always stuck with me. A coworker lives on the lake and used to bring her boys and the neighbor’s kids swimming every afternoon. After the kids were grown, her neighbor said that her biggest regret was spending her time mowing her lawn in a certain pattern instead of just getting it done and going swimming with her kids. Priorities (and minimizing regrets). I don’t think you’ll ever look back and say “I remember that Wednesday back in 2017 when I didn’t get the dusting done”. <3