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It’s never good when you get a text from your boss that starts with the words, “Uh, oh.”

There I was, sitting at my desk, minding my own business and surfing the Lonely Planet website on my break for summertime surf destinations, when I hear the familiar sound of my iPhone signaling a new text message. I look down at the screen and see the words, “Uh, oh.”

Long story short, because Tabs booked back-to-back kitty modeling jobs for every week this summer, I don’t get to take any vacation time through September.

Not one day.

“Uh, oh,” he says. “All booked up for summer. No vacations for either of us.”

Either of us, he says. As if! He’s not the one stuck in Novato. He gets to see the world, stay at four-star hotels, eat at the best restaurants, and never has to pay a thing, while I’m eating grilled-cheese sandwiches at home and having Mango Bars for dessert.

Sometimes, it’s just not fair…

Seriously, his idea of slumming it is having to stay at the Four Seasons on The Big Island, instead of Maui.

I know, I know — Tabs is the talent; I’m just the assistant. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have a right to get angry.

Oh, well… Hopefully these new pieces from the limited edition Estée Lauder Bronze Goddess Capri Collection can cheer me up.

The summer 2012 release coasts on to counters stores next month (it’s currently available now online) and comes with two summery fragrances and 13 bronzed bits, some new and some re-promoted, in sun-kissed shades of gold, brown, turquoise and white.

Reviews coming just as soon as I finish transcribing Tabs’ manuscript.

Oh, yeah — didn’t I mention? He’s writing his autobiography right now. It begins, “Meow, mrow, meow-meow.”

What a diva, right? Cat’s got some nerve… 🙂

Here’s a quick look at seven pieces from the release. Have a look, and let me know what you think.

Pure Color Five Color Gelee Powder EyeShadow Palette in Bronze Sands

Pure Color Illuminating Powder Gelee in Shimmering Sands

Pure Color Nail Lacquer in Molten Lava
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Dear Mr. Draper,

Thank you so much for your kind note! It’s always so nice to hear from you.

As you know, I’ve served as head of West Coast operations here at Tabs the Cat Industries, LLC, for five years now, and while I currently love what I do, I feel it soon may be time for a change. Your recruiter couldn’t have picked a better time to contact me.

I’m so flattered that you and your team believe that I should be the person to take the new International Pet Modeling/Gravy Division at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce to the next level.

I had my lawyer skim through the contract you sent over, and I have a couple of quick questions.

First of all, how flexible are you on the requirement that all employees drink during the day? I understand if it’s part of the corporate culture, but I’m something of a teetotaler and have a difficult time functioning even after a small glass of wine. If possible, I’d like to remove that clause.

Also, I must insist on having my own office and assistant. I was informed that Ms. Olson’s desk is located near the employee break room. I do not know how Peggy feels about that, but such an arrangement would not work for me.

If I do accept the position, I would also like to be able to invite friends of mine to the office from time to time, like Cherry and Evening Rose. Both are part of the new Estee Lauder Mad Men collection. Not only are they very familiar with your work, but I would go so far as to call them admirers of yours…

Lipstick in Cherry on the left and Creme Rouge in Evening Rose on the right

Creme Rouge in Evening Rose
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