Tabs

From the very beginning here at Tabs the Cat Industries, LLC, Tabs has kept the company culture very much in line with other Bay Area startups — on-site gym, child and kitten care, 24/7 catering and a lax dress code (hoodies, flip-flops and ironic t-shirts strongly encouraged).

But I sense a change coming. With the company’s rapid expansion into the burgeoning global gravy market, the rumors have started, and some of the employees suspect that things around here are about to get a lot more corporate.

Of course, rumor mills will churn! The other day by the water cooler, I overheard Tabs say that he was planning on ditching the casual dress code. Yeah, he wants the place to have a more fashion-forward, kitty-centric look, and I’m not sure how I feel about that…

I do want to be a team player, though, and since the writing’s on the wall, I better start building my new wardrobe now. To that end, I spent some time this weekend shopping online for more appropriate cat-centered accessories and clothes.

And since I know that some of you are also full-time pet assistants, I thought I’d share some of the cool cat things I found. I mean, you never know when your kitty dictator/employer will put a new dress code in place. Cats do talk amongst themselves, after all, and it can’t hurt to be prepared. 🙂

So, here are…

21 Cat-Themed Clothes and Accessories for the Corporate Cat Office

1. The Cute Cat T-Shirt

$30, available now at the PrettySnake Etsy shop.

2. Cats Are My Boyfriend Sweatshirt

$29, available now at the DentzDesign Etsy shop.

3. Red/Orange Undies With Two Cute Cats

$14, available now at the NinaValkhoff Etsy shop.

4. The Constant Companion Ring in Persian Cat

$74.99, available now at ModCloth.

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Okay, so the writers of The Walking Dead are totally earning their keep so far this season. Fo’ reals! The show is in the midst of a third-season renaissance!

Sure, you have to like zombies and whatnot, but luckily, I do. 🙂

I got so fired up watching tonight’s episode that as soon as it was over I clicked over to amazon.com and started filling my cart with emergency supplies! — you know, just in case.

1. Aquamira Water Treatment Drops 1oz – $10.83
2. Fancy Feast Gourmet Cat Food, Grilled Seafood Variety Pack, 3-Ounce Cans (Pack of 24) – $13.68
3. Mainstay Emergency Food Rations – 3600 Calorie Bars (Single) – $8.49
4. Mountain House Freeze Dried Meals (Pack of 10) – $39.99
5. Charmin Ultra Soft Toilet Tissue (40 Rolls) – $31.50
6. Emergency Mylar Thermal Blankets (Pack of 10) – $8.57
7. Ambient Weather WR-111A Emergency Solar Hand Crank AM/FM/NOAA Digital Radio, Flashlight, Cell Phone Charger – $41.87
8. Emergency Fire Starter – $3.25
9. Cyalume SnapLight Industrial Grade Chemical Light Sticks, Yellow, 6″ Long, 12 Hour Duration (Pack of 10) – $10.19
10. 100 Feet of Rothco 550lb. Type III Nylon Paracord (in Pink) – $8.43
11. SAS Survival Handbook, Revised Edition: For Any Climate, in Any Situation – $12.18
12. UAG Limited Signature Series Tactical 10.5″ Black Stainless Steel Military Combat Grade Battle Axe Tomahawk Hunter Camping Survival Tool With Nylon Belt Sheath – $17.99
13. Leatherman 830039 New Wave Multitool with Leather/Nylon Combination Sheath – $60.89
14. First Aid Only Outdoor First Aid Kit, Soft Case, 205-Piece Kit – $21.75

LOL! But seriously, I should probably have some of these things around the house…and not just for zombies, but for any kind of emergency.

Do you have an emergency kit at home? If you do, what’s in it? Obviously, Tabs has one just for his personal supplies — kitty litter, cases of gravy and bags of dry food, spare feather toys, that kind of thing — but I feel like we should have one for the humans, too. 🙂

In other news, Tabs had a pretty busy week of kitty modeling. Lots going on in the world of feline fabulosity, and here are some of his latest pics…

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Ooh! I watched the season premiere of The Walking Dead tonight with Tabs, and it was…interesting.

Tabs and I shared a big tub of microwave popcorn, and I took notes during the show while he barked out orders like, “Mrrow.” [Look into getting us a dirt bike for quick escapes, and get straps to attach a cat carrier.]

Tabs actually loves zombie movies, shows and literature. He’s read more than 100 zombie books, something he refers to as “research,” and he takes his zombie apocalypse preparations very seriously. For instance, he has stockpiles of gravy that even I don’t know about, and he’s drafted elaborate emergency plans.

In the event of a zombie outbreak, I am to report to the Emergency Operations Center (EOC) at Makeup and Beauty Blog headquarters, where I will be responsible for opening the cans of gravy, thanks to my time-tested opposable thumbs.

Tabs says that in the zombie books he’s read, cats rarely play a major role, but he attributes this to feline self-sufficiency. See, cats don’t stick around when the sh*t hits the fan. No way. They turn tail and run!

Still, he hopes the day never comes, though, because it would result in a serious drop in worldwide gravy production. 🙂

In other news, this was a pretty busy week for Tabs, irrespective of zombies. He had kitty modeling jobs for a number of big beauty brands. I don’t know if you’re into that kind of thing (kitty supermodeling), but if you are, here are the highlights from this week’s campaigns…

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I’m sitting here in the living room eating popcorn and watching the fifth season of Friday Night Lights, and Tabs is nowhere to be found. I think he turned in early, totally tuckered out after the rollicking weekend he had.

He didn’t party in the traditional sense, but he did host a couple of parties — or rather I did, seeing as how I take care of that kind of thing for him as his professional pet assistant/lackey.

Let me just say this: if I never see another catnip cocktail in my entire life, it’ll be too soon.

I’m sure he’ll be down for dinner… Tabs hasn’t missed a dinner in, um, ever. He better hurry, though, because I don’t know how much longer I’ll be awake.

I may try to coax him downstairs with cookie dough… Seriously, it’s the weirdest thing. Whenever I bake cookies and bust out one of those tubes of Toll House cookie dough, Tabs comes runnin’. I don’t know if it’s the crinkling of the packaging or the scent of the dough, but he stands up on his hind legs at the kitchen counters, meows and flashes his sad eyes like he’s saying, “Please, miss, can you spare a cookie? I’m so very hungry.”

Yeah, right! We all know that’s B.S., as evidenced by his No. 1 ranking from the Association of Plus Size Kitty Supermodels, and it doesn’t look like he’s going to lose that ranking anytime soon, not with busy modeling weeks like this one. Here are some of the campaigns he did… 🙂

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Had a pretty great afternoon today, even though I had to work. But it wasn’t really work, per se. Tabs took me to lunch — his excuse to talk about Halloween costume ideas — but at least I got a free meal out of it. We went to this gourmet burger joint called The Counter, and I finally got the veggie burger and fries I’d been wanting all week.

The restaurant had a TV behind the bar, and I glanced up to see the Steelers playing the Raiders. I know that Tabs is a huge football fan, so I took the opportunity to pick his brain. I asked him what it was like playing professional football for the Mill Valley Wildcats before he got into kitty modeling.

He looked off into space for a minute, just sort of stared and smiled… “Meow,” he finally said. [It was one of the toughest jobs I ever had, but I loved every minute.] He went on to describe the camaraderie, the adrenalin rush, the nervousness he felt before every game.

He told me all about some of the technical aspects of the game, like how there are 11 cats on offense, defense and 11 more on special teams. He played on offense, tight end, because he was a little too husky to play wide receiver but not fast enough to be a running back.

After retiring from the game, he briefly considered going into coaching. He’s always liked molding new talent, but he wanted something more stable. As a coach, you lose one big game and you’re out. At least with kitty modeling, when you’re as good looking as Tabs, you can count on a few good years. I have to say, though, he’s a great teacher, and very inspiring. I bet he would have made an excellent coach.

I guess it’s not too late. He could always coach up-and-coming kitty models. 🙂

This was a decent week for his career. He had modeling jobs for a few big beauty brands, and here are some of the pics…

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